Birmingham, Alabama – A local man called Marvin Halbert is in police custody after employees of Walmart discovered him having ‘inappropriate carnal relations’ with a pig in the supermarket restroom. The disturbing discovery was made after customers reported hearing a noisy ‘squealing’ noise coming from the bathroom.
One of the customers told local news outlets that her seven year-old son went into the bathroom, and ran out screaming, “Mommy, mommy! There’s a man in the bathroom holding a pig really close to him! And the pig’s crying!”
Not sure quite what to make of her son’s report, the woman reported it to the nearest store clerk who alerted a colleague to investigate. Raymond Cooper, a warehouse worker, entered the restroom and was shocked at the discovery he made…
“When I went into the bathroom, I heard squealing from inside the stall. I told the man to open it but he wouldn’t, so I kicked it in. That crazy ass fool for real was doing a pig. I socked him in the face and grabbed the pig. That fool was out cold.” He said.
Not long after, the police arrived and Halbert was taken into their custody. According to some customers who bore witness, Halbert was crying, pleading and shouting, “I want my piggy back.”
The man later admitted to cops that he had nowhere else to take his beloved farm pig for any ‘alone time’ after his wife of some forty years had kicked the pair out of the house once she found out the barnyard pet was her husband’s ‘secret new lover’.
The accused, Mr.Halbert, was charged with multiple counts of indecent exposure and cruelty to animals for the incident. They tried to release the pig to his wife Patty, but she refused. The pig, which Halbert nicknamed ‘Snug Um’s’, has been adopted by the Humane Society and is undergoing therapy sessions with a Porcine Psychiatrist.